I'll Never Use a Dollar with Reagan's Face

ANDY JACKSON TREATED EVERYONE JUST LIKE THEY WERE KIN
HE SAID, “THE WHITE HOUSE IS YOUR HOUSE, JUST WALK RIGHT IN.”
RONNIE NEVER CARED MUCH FOR THE HUMAN RACE
I’LL NEVER USE A TWENTY WITH REAGAN’S FACE

ALEXANDER HAMILTON IS ON THE TEN
HE WAS THINKING ABOUT THE ECONOMY WAY BACK WHEN
ALEX EVEN STARTED OUR VERY FIRST BANK
IT WAS RONNIE WHO LET THE S&LS TANK

JEFFERSON’S ON THE NICKEL, WE COULD NOT GIVE HIM LESS
HE WANTED US TO PURSUE HAPPINESS
TOMMY WROTE THE WORDS THAT MADE US FREE
RONNIE WAS THE CAUSE OF SO MUCH MISERY

F.D.R.’S PORTRAIT IS ON THE DIME
THE DEPRESSION SURE WAS A FRIGHTENING TIME
FRANKLIN PUT THE COUNTRY, BACK ON ITS TRACK
RONNIE ALMOST BROUGHT THE DEPRESSION BACK

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WASHINGTON’S ON THE DOLLAR AND THERE HE WILL STAY
IF IT WEREN’T FOR GEORGE, WE’D BE BRITISH TODAY
RONNIE WOULD HAVE LOVED TO HAVE BEEN WEARING A CROWN
LET’S PUT HIM AND MAGGIE THATCHER, BOTH ON THE POUND

ON THE FIFTY DOLLAR BILL WE’VE GOT ULYSSES S. GRANT
HE WON THE CIVIL WAR, BEFORE HE WAS PRESIDENT
HE PUT AN END TO OUR BLOODIEST STRIFE
AND THAT WASN’T JUST A MOVIE
THAT WAS REAL LIFE

BEN FRANKLIN’S ON THE HUNDRED, I DON’T THINK HE’D OPPOSE
HE TAUGHT US TO BE THRIFTY SO WE COULD SEE MORE OF THOSE
BEN ALWAYS FOLLOWED THE DIPLOMAT’S PATH
RONNIE TRADED ARMS FOR HOSTAGES, YOU DO THE MATH

LINCOLN FREED THE SLAVES, HE GETS THE FIVE DOLLAR BILL
ABE SAVED THE UNION BY THE FORCE OF HIS WILL
NOW CAN YOU IMAGINE RONNIE THERE IN HIS PLACE
I’LL NEVER USE A FIVER WITH REAGAN’S FACE